Tuesday, July 19, 2011

When elephants and lions start working together, none of us are safe.


A WOMAN has been eaten by a lion after it escaped from a game reserve in Kenya.

Martha Nduta was said to have been attacked in her own home, and dragged from the property on Friday.
Officials, who searched the area in the Nyahururu district for her, found only a human skull and a few scraps of bone.
Relatives identified the tragic 58-year-old's body from the remains of her ripped clothes and a shoe found at the scene.
Francio Nyamatari, Laikipia West police chief, said Kenya Wildlife Service rangers are now hunting the male lion as panic-stricken villagers fear it may strike again.
It is believed the rogue animal escaped through a broken fence at the private Laikipia Nature Conservancy before entering a nearby village, 110 miles north of Nairobi.
The reserve, which works to ensure the protection of wildlife, is a huge site surrounded by an electric fence to keep dangerous animals inside.
But local reports suggest part of the barrier had recently been destroyed by elephants.

Saturday, July 9, 2011

Fan falls over railing at Texas Rangers game, dies

When Josh Hamilton threw the ball into the stands Thursday, he couldn't have known it would cause a fan to fall over the railing, down to his death. I feel sorry for that guy and his family, but I can't imagine how tough it is on Josh Hamilton, too.

Study shows women more likely to cause accidents

Study shows women more likely to cause accidents
I'm surprised that women walking down the street haven't caused me to have an accident.

Redd Foxx' stuttering parachutist joke

From Redd Foxx: The parachuting instructor, right before the jump, reminded his students to count to ten, pull the ripcord. A stuttering man asked, "Wh-wh-what ab-ab-ab-out me?" The instructor replied, "You better count to ONE."
Yes, I feel just terrible for posting that.

Reading Ted Williams' autobiography when young

When I was growing up, I was a voracious reader of baseball books, most of which were written by adults. One book I read was Ted Williams' autobiography. My mom picked up on it right away when I started calling people SOBs, without knowing what that stood for.

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Mailman poops in customer's yard.Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night... nor REALLY, REALLY HAVING TO TAKE A DUMP! ...stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds."

Adventures in Spanish

Mark Fowler reports that A friend of his niece has a very ornate tattoo that reads "Last of a dying bread." Reminds me of a few adventures in Spanish.

Once in a Juarez bar, Don Felix, I asked for a "vaso de hielo," wanting a glass with just ice. My friends behind the bar gave me a hard time; seems their glasses are all made of glass, not ice.

A few years ago in Dallas, they had signs at bus stops that included the phrase, "...entablar el camion...," wanting to refer to getting on the bus, but instead, their idea of "boarding the bus" meant nailing boards to the bus.

Finally, at Danals Restaurant in Irving, TX, a favorite hangout of mine, most of the customers and employees spoke Spanish as their primary language. One of the waitresses, not so much. Having a sore arm, she said, "Me duele mi arma." I did not laugh at her, but I did have a good time re-telling the story to other people in the place. "Arma," of course, refers to a weapon, not a body part.